CONSUMER PRODUCT REVIEW SPECIAL!!

Do you ever sit there and think to yourself how cool it is to be alive today? As opposed to being alive 100 years ago, or even 1,000 years ago? I often contemplate the technology I take for granted and how easy it makes my life compared to those who came before. For example, did you know 2-Ply toilet paper wasn’t introduced until 1942? Can you imagine the chafing experienced by our forefathers? It’s no wonder those Germans were so angry in the 1930’s. (Too soon?)

While it is awesome to have the technology we have, 100 years from now our ancestors will no doubt think these were the dark ages (only 2-Ply?! How did they live???).

One of the pieces of technology that I am particularly fond of is my Kindle. Karina got it for me for Christmas in 2011. Before it, all of my reading had to be accomplished using archaic devices known as “books”.

Perhaps you find yourself wondering whether a Kindle is right for you. Allow me to give my opinion.

For those of you who are unaware, Kindles are electronic books specifically formatted to work with Amazon’s vast supply of electronic books (there are other readers like the Nook that work with other e-book suppliers). The term Kindle means “to start (or ignite) a fire”. I don’t know about you, but fire is exactly what I enjoy thinking about when plugging my electronic device in to charge for the night. Also, I can’t imagine a better demographic than readers to indirectly associate books with burning. Personally, this is one of the most poorly named products in history. Possibly second behind Chevrolet’s disastrous “3-Car Pileup” concept vehicle (later change to Lumina).

They represent the pinnacle of reading technology:

What I love about the Kindle is that virtually any book I can think of is at my fingertips. If I find out about an awesome new tome, I can be reading it within 2 minutes. The obvious drawback to this is the lack of time to reconsider my book choice before actually spending money on it. That’s why you will find approximately 80% of the books from Oprah’s Book Club sitting unread in my Kindle history.

Actually reading with a Kindle did take a bit of getting used to. Before the Kindle, the books I read required a lot of manual activity to get through. For example, just to get to the next page I would have to lift my right arm, grasp the page (not nearly as easy as it sounds as there are usually tens of pages in the books I read), and flip that page over to display the next one. And I would have to do this for EVERY page!! Now, all I have to do to turn a page is touch the right side of the screen. I’m practically napping while reading!! This is a very convenient feature, but I will say, I’ve never accidentally touched the wrong area of a page in a book and accidentally ended up in an online store.

Another very convenient feature is the ability to change text size with a simple click of a button. That way I can share the same book with my grandmother. Before, I’d have to buy the regular copy and find the Reader’s Digest Large Print edition for my grandmother to read. Or, if I wanted to make the text bigger, I’d have to go through this process:

Probably my favorite thing about the Kindle is the number of books I can fit in it. Literally thousands of pages of text will fit in the device I can hold in one hand. It’s pretty amazing to think about. And those texts are all anonymous to the people I am around. I love going to a coffee shop and reading a good book. However, numerous humiliating trips made me realize society isn’t ready for a grown man to walk into Starbucks with a Hardy Boys novel. However, when I walk in carrying my Kindle with my monocle and pipe, everyone assumes I’m there to read a literary masterpiece like War and Piece or Twilight: New Moon.

My Kindle is the basic black and white version. It is not as fancy as some of the other newer, color Kindle Fires (holy cow, they are throwing caution to the wind and straight up saying “Fire” in the name of their electronic device!). But, I’ve found black and white are the two hues most of my books came in anyway.

One feature on the newest Kindle that Amazon is heavily touting is the “Mayday” button. This button automatically connects you face-to-face to a tech support representative. I have two issues with this:

1. I have never had to call tech support while reading a book.)”I’ve finished reading this page. WHAT DO I DO NOW?)
2. Possibly more disconcertingly, I have privacy issues in regard to having a video chat with a stranger literally one button away from fruition. Most of the times I read I am not ready for company. In fact, one of my favorite times to read is when I am reigning on the Throne of Solitude…if you know what I mean.

When I first saw the Mayday button commercial, a very unpleasant thought popped into my mind.

Here is the actual commercial:

Here is what I automatically thought of (please note, there is a bit of bathroom humor in this video…you have been warned)

Well, I hope my experience with the Kindle has assisted with the tough decision that I decided to give you in order to created a premise for my blog. While there are some quirks to get used to, Kindles are a very cool way to get my reading done. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I am going to go ahead and get fully dressed in the event I accidentally hit the Mayday button again.